Tuesday, March 23, 2010

A sick person needs " . . . the absence of pain and the presence of family." -Helen Hayes

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonics so powerful as expectation of something better tomorrow. -O. Swett Marden

A sense of humor can help you overlook the unattractive, tolerate the unpleasant, cope with the unexpected, and smile through the unbearable. -Moshe Waldoks

Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in the long run. -Charles Chaplin

Don't deny the diagnosis; try to defy the verdict. -Norman Cousins

We are all here for a spell. Get all the good laughs you can. -Will Rogers

The most wasted day of all is that on which we have not laughed. -Sebastian Comfort

Humor can be a way to move from "grin and bear it" to "grin and share it." -Joel Goodman

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs-jolted by every pebble in the road. -Henry Ward Beecher

The witch doctor succeeds for the same reason all the rest of us succeed. Each patient carries his own doctor inside him. They come to us not knowing that truth. We are at our best when we give the doctor who resides within each patient a chance to go to work. -Albert Schweitzer, MD

When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us. -Helen Keller

Humor is contagious. Laughter is infectious. Both are good for your health. -William Fry, MD

Sometimes you just need to look reality in the eye, and deny it. -Garrison Keillor

When one door closes, another door always opens-but these long hallways are a real drag. -bumper sticker

There ain't any answer. There ain't going to be any answer. There never has been an answer . . . That's the answer. -Gertrude Stein

A sick person needs " . . . the absence of pain and the presence of family." -Helen Hayes

Hope is the feeling you have that the feeling you have isn't permanent. -Jean Kerr

Getting well is not the only goal. Even more important is learning to live without fear, to be at peace with life, and ultimately death. -Bernie Siegel, MD

If you can laugh at it, you can live with it. -Anonymous

One of the best things people can have up their sleeve is a funny bone. -Richard L. Weaver, II

Humor reminds us of our fragility, our earthiness, our dustiness, our propensity to mess things up even when we have the best of intentions, our powerlessness apart from God. -Cal Samara

Come, thieving time, take what you must, Quickness to move, to hear, to see, When dust gathers near to dust, Such diminutions need must be, But leave, O leave, exempt from plunder, My sense of humor, curiosity, and wonder. -Anonymous poem, from 93 year-old lady, given to her pastor in Washington church

Laughter is a melody, a concert from the heart, a tickling by angels, creative living art. Laughter heals and comforts, sometimes gentle sometimes bold. Laughter is a freeing dance, performed within the soul. -Serene West

lately im just thankful to be able to breathe

Go ahead as you waste your days with thinking
When you fall everyone stands
Another day and you've had your fill of sinking
With the life held in your
Hands are shaking cold
These hands are meant to hold

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
Move along
Move along

So a day when you've lost yourself completely
Could be a night when your life ends
Such a heart that will lead you to deceiving
All the pain held in your
Hands are shaking cold
Your hands are mine to hold

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
Move along
(Go on, go on, go on, go on)

When everything is wrong, we move along
(Go on, go on, go on, go on)
When everything is wrong, we move along
Along, along, along

When all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through

(Go on, go on, go on, go on)
Right back what is wrong
We move along

Thursday, March 4, 2010

what other way to vent then for the whole world to see on the internet...

So I have been sick.. going on about 2 months now and i feel like im getting a new symptom every day.. We cant figure this thing out and its getting worse.. Possibly lead poisoning, a parasite, a tumor, genetic disorder, a combination of the previous mentioned or God is really mad at me.. kidding.. I know this isnt a funny topic but its better to laugh then cry which i feel myself doing way too much lately cause honestly this shit is just painful.. I wish it would leave as fast as it came and i really have sympathy for anyone else who goes through any painful trauma in life. I really have a whole new perspective on how i will live life once i get through this shit.. thats right i said once because im fighting to beat it whatever it is.

I know it def sux not being able to eat and its like taking cake away from a fat kid cause im starving and miss food soo much but my apparently my body doesnt feel the same for whatever reason.. For the past 2 weeks i have been living off ensure and if im lucky chicken broth both of which im not taking in as much as i need cause its just that painful.. At least i have my mind though which can be a blessing and a curse at the same time.. Your mind likes to run wild with possibilities but at the end of the day you just have to tell it hey, we will get through this we are only 25 and we are doing the best we can.. I feel that i am really fortunate to have so many people who care about me and are helping me through this. Especially my dad who is doing everything in his power to make me better as busy as he is.. I mean sometimes i wake him up at 2 am and he will just give me more meds and lay with me and just hope we dont have to go to the hospital.. I just think the world of him and know that just because im 25 doesnt mean he stops being my dad. I would really like to get better though so it could be the opposite and i could help him more but right now its a waiting game. I do know that once i get better i will def take care of my body the best way possible and also my mind because it really is that important. there is not sooner time to start than now.. life is just too short and i really need to be better to myself. Although when this is all said and done i def want a french dip from mahi mahs cause thats what i have been craving through all of this.

when all is said in done, I think prayer and gods plan does work. I havent been that religious for awhile but lately im def praying to god to help me make it through the day when my body cant find the strength to make it myself.. Plus all of these things keep happening that really make me believe its God's will.. Like the fact that im home, the fact that my sister got a job in a field that knows somewhat about my condition and to a doctor that might have an answer, the fact that both of my parents are physicians and might know ppl that can help me cause nothings working.. All of these things make me think God is def trying and i have to leave it up to him. I'll admit i have been mad at god before for things that happened in my life but i think we all have.. We all question why is this happening to me.. But as life goes on more questions get answered and it starts to make sense.. I know i might sound crazy but unless youve been through it you cant judge.. and honestly.. no one wants to go through this cause it just plain sucks. Lately im just hoping that days start to get better instead of worse cause im really trying to stay positive but im still suffering.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Im bored so why not blog about it!

I can't believe it is 3 days until Christmas and it feels nothing like it! Well, we are in Spain where it seems to rain during the whole month of December and I have never been away from home for Christmas so it is no surprise it feels different. I am really starting to get homesick though so I am glad that I will be home for a visit in a month. I hope i get used to flying so long alone because then I would def come back more. It feels like we will be here forever and 2012 is a long time away so I think going home will help break up the monotony of this place. Also, I wish people would come visit here too because this place would be better if people came here. School has been going well. I have been making straight A's so I cant complain but I am not looking forward to the classes that start in January because they are just going to get harder and require more work. I cannot wait to be done with dreaded school but I still have at least 2 more years so I better get used to it. I do hate online classes though and miss f2f interaction. Plus, I hate posting required responses to peoples discussions when I really have nothing to say. Everyone is so generic.. "great post! Cant wait to see how it develops! yada yada BS! hehe just my thoughts on that...

I think its sad when people die around the holidays. It makes me think about it everytime the holidays roll around and all those families missing their loved ones. My dad's friend Ron died a couple of days ago and I can't stop thinking about it. I just happened to read the obituaries online and holy crap.. I didnt believe it. He truly was a person with a heart of Gold and I wish he knew how much of an impact he had on people's lives. I was reading comments people left as tributes and he saved so many people's lives.. its amazing. Most of the memories I have of him is when my parents were still together and he would come over for holiday parties. He was so good with kids and I dont even think he knew it. He would leave us presents outside our door every christmas even if he hadnt seen us in years. I just think its amazing how much someone can affect you without even knowing they did. He makes me want to be a better person. He also makes me think about all the good in this world when it can feel so evil sometimes. At least now he is a peace and will have time to relax and take the time to himself he never had.

Well thats all I can think to write about right now but im so looking forward to coming back to VA and I hope New Years in Gibraltar is fun!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Breakfast at casa de Morton's

So we decided to make Bloody Marys and spinach and veggie souffles like panera for saturday morning breakfast and mmmm it was good! And those are my lovely 'new' tables that I painted to match my plates and living room.

Monday, August 31, 2009

Its late but im not tired yet

My weekend was pretty uneventful. It consisted of playing raquetball and watching Rome (HBO miniseries). That show is pretty addicting but this is also coming from a person who has like 2 channels here so I have to rent anything and everything. We also bought new raquetball raquets and mine is pink and grey. Its sooo pretty. Today Dick and I went to a cookout for his work. He was required to go and it was his day off so it sucked but it was alright. I felt like the only girl there because there were only like 2 other wives and they were off with their kids. So we basically hung out with a bunch of navy guys and I felt old cause some of them look like babies fresh outta highschool, its weird. I dont want to get old. I dont want to have kids for awhile. I think I would be happy staying 25 for at least 3 more years :) I am just so used to being young and everyone being older thats its a new feeling when you realize that youre not so young anymore. I hate the thought of my dad getting older too. I think thats what scares me the most. Even though Im not financially dependent on him anymore, I feel like I will always be emotionally dependent on him because he has just always been there for me. I feel like I could really tell him anything and he would just be like yup, thats how life works hun. I have always seen him struggle in life even though he possesses so many talents and for once I would just like to see him happy. I know its out of my control but I really wish/hope that his life and marriage get better if for nothing more than his health. Well thats as deep as im getting tonight and I think this post helped tire me out some.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Been too long

I need to update this thing more because its fun to go back and read. Plus, I dont have the most exciting schedule lately so its something to do. So, Im in Spain, finally here and I miss home like crazy. I miss the littlest things like being able to go to the mall, starbucks, panera, borders, or even my crappy little townhouse. Im hoping this will pass and I will get more adjusted here but it just isnt home. Plus, I like Northern Europe or Italy better. They just seem to have different food and more places to go. I want to be able to travel but its so hard because Dick doesnt have that much time and he doesnt have a passport yet. Oh well, patience is a virtue I guess..
School starts soon so that should keep me a little more occupied. It sux sharing one car but there isnt many places to go anyway besides the nex and commissary. I have been doing a lot more cooking lately. Pretty much everyday which is a big accomplishment for me haha The other day we decided we were going to make italian sausages out of turkey sausage, peppers, and onions. We both didnt realize how hot habanero peppers were and decided to buy them in the process. I will never make this mistake again. I cut up the onions, green peppers, and then the habaneros and sauteed them in a pan. I washed my hands and a little while later managed to touch close to my eye. It burned in agony and I screamed. I told Dick to look up what to do online or else he is going to have to call poison control because im going to go blind. Meanwhile, I was soaking in water and milk because I figured it was a base so why not. This did little. He told me to stick my eye under the faucet which made the capsicum spread and hurt even more. I was really in pain. Finally, he read something that said put yogurt on it. So i run to the fridge and stick a while glob of yogurt on my eye. Dick decides he is going to try to take a picture of me with yogurt on my eye because its funny. I think.. why did i get married again cause im in sooo much pain. Eventually the pain went away but my hands burned for the next 10 hrs because of cutting the peppers with no gloves. Needless to say, the peppers never got eaten. We ended up tossing them because they made the green beans in another pan hot just from using the same spatula. haha.
So I have def learned different things here. On a good note, the wine and olives here are amazing. They have this wine called tinto de verano (summer wine) and you drink it with soda and its sooo good. I also realized that Olives with lemons or garlic are the best. Well I think this post is a good start for now. I will write more when I have more to write about!